Lately I have been having some issues with what God's plan is for me. I wonder why I am in this country all alone? I wonder sometimes if I'm just here going with the motion or what am I really doing. I get discouraged and feel forgotten. I look around and think why would I have to suffer and be alone without my husband for a year? Then I really look and see the blessings that God has provided in my life even though I do not see them.
I have some of the BEST family in the world! God allowed Cody and I to meet and be husband and wife. Not only is he the best husband but he provided me with a true family. I have parents who love me and would do anything for me! Cody got Chloe for me, which sounds silly but she is helping me so much to get through this deployment. It's like Gods way of putting his love into something I can see. I know that Cody and I will (and do now) appreciate each other even more and know how important each one of us are! I'm learning even more how to be an independent and strong women so I can be a better wife and mother(someday). I think I am also starting to learn that being a strong women means being closer to God. I also have struggled with school, I've had ups and downs with it. I am not on my final class and it is the easiest class I have ever taken! The teacher is so easy on grading. Week 4 is about to start and I have a 100% in the class. We are able to have 1 brand new Jeep and a really nice sports car. We can pay our bills and have plenty left over. I have a home that I can be warm in and feel comfortable. I have great friends that support me (sometimes overwhelm me) but that is okay! I am hardly ever sick and I have no health issues. I will be a college graduate in 6 weeks, coming home to visit my entire family, and seeing Cody not to long after that!
It is so much harder to focus on the good things of life when sadness is around me. When I really think about my life I can see God is here and God is in control. Even though I might think things are bad, God has blessed me beyond belief! When I have down days, I need to focus more on what my life is about and rely even more on God. He is always there and never leaves! I think sometimes I get the selfish bug and I have to always remember it's not about me! It is about being a better person towards people and showing them God's love!
Dear Alicia,
ReplyDeleteDon't worry about God's plan for you. All of us experience these same thoughts and concerns during our lives.
Years from now, when you and Cody are celebrating many years of marriage, you both will look back on this time as one of the happiest in your lives. You are both experiencing people and places the rest of us can only dream about.
Whenever you feel blue, just remember you have many friends and family members who are thinking about you and Cody each day. We are very proud of you both.
Mike
Ditto - can't say it any better than that :)
ReplyDeleteThank you Mike and Paula. Times are good and I'm so thankful for what we have. It's little things like not having my hubby to vent to that are hard, but I'm learning how to deal with that. Having a great supportive family and friends help the most!!! :) Love you guys!
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